Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Friendly Woods Vampire
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| wigenweb.org. |
My biggest problem with Louis is the same problem I have with all Vampires who fail at ethical vampirism: why don’t you just live in the woods? You can’t resist human blood long enough to be in the same room with someone? You have no business living among humans, then, and you are putting countless lives at risk just to try to test your own goddamn willpower.
The woods are full of game, guy,
and you can live off animal blood. This was the 1790s in New Orleans; you
didn’t even have the problems with hunting regulations we do today, and the fur
traders hadn’t yet run animal populations into the ground. You – woods, now! Or
the mountains, or some other uninhabited region – it’s 1791, and there’s lots
of it.
Yeah, sunlight problem: get some of
your slaves to build you a woods hut, within a one-night’s journey. Yeah, yeah,
the killing is symptomatic of the loss of humanity inherent in the Vampirism
and all that. How do you know which direction the correlation or causation runs
(do you even know which it is)? Has anybody ever even tried ‘separation as
redemption’? Test it: if I’m wrong, the test results would reflect it, and at
least you know that you tried.
Louis still had enough ‘humanity’
(whatever the fuck hell that means) to try the animal blood route for a little
while, and avoid some murder – he could have made the escape then. Maybe ‘loss
of humanity’ (there’s that word again) is a gradual process. Maybe it’s like a
progressive illness: stop it at the right time, and you avoid the worst of the
symptoms, or even make a full recovery. Just test the damn thing: this was
after the Scientific Revolution, and they had the scientific method.
If you’re in the woods sucking down
animals, you might be able to retrain your body to rely on them. Then you could
return to civilization. Say you end up killing an explorer or a traveler –
that’s terrible, yes, but compare that death against all the people you would
have killed had you stayed in the city for some damned reason.
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| http://www.twilighthooked.com. |
Really, he’ll have to talk to you
eventually, no matter how much he hates you for imprisoning him and ruining his
life and stopping his serial genocide. People go crazy in solitary confinement,
so I’ll bet you’ll have a better relationship than ever as you both try to stave
off desperate, crushing loneliness. And you guys don’t seem to really talk to
or interact with anyone else anyway (killing doesn’t count), so would this even
be that much of a break from your routine?
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| http://www.finalgirlproject.com. |
It’s the Enlightenment: sentence
him to hours of reading philosopher tracts. It’s a start. Jeremy Bentham would
be best, but you could always go with Rousseau. If you can get your hands on them. Not Hobbes, though. Never Hobbes. If Lestat can’t read them, which
I suspect, then read them at him – long-term prisoners will eventually listen
to anything to stave off another few hours of staring at blank walls. If
nothing else, at least you’ll benignly torture him.
Hey, compare that plan to the one that failed, which as far
as I could see was: eat up your finite supply of livestock and then, um – eat
Lestat?
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| therottingzombie.blogspot.com |
You’re a slave master: you couldn’t get a
few slaves to bleed into a bucket for you? Lestat’s method of murdering them
really isn’t very sustainable: slaves were expensive, and he was draining your
fortune literally and figuratively (which makes his ‘gold digger sire’ thing
even stupider). How were you going to even keep your plantation up and running
if he keeps killing the slaves?
Why not just try getting them all
to bleed for you, in another room, and then drink it after they leave? They’re
slaves – asking them to bleed for you is probably the least awful thing you’ve
ever done to them. Maybe they’d be less likely to revolt that way, you know,
compared to when Lestat was killing them.
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| reviews-of-movies-i-watched.blogspot.com |
Honestly, the mass consumption
method of vampirism works just as well as economically: getting large numbers
of people to give small amounts of blood/money is a much better recipe for
wealth and health than getting small numbers of people to give large amounts of
blood/money. Ask Bill Gates!
Yeah, some businesses can get by on
tiny niche markets or a few wealthy and devoted customers (Business jargon: whales. Hey, blue whales have 15,000 pints of blood), but in your case,
your customers are really frigging cash-strapped. Yeah, Lestat will never see
your point, but he’s never run a business before. You could always try locking
him in the attic.
Or, if you must, just kill him.
That’s a tough threshold to establish, but given that his successful escape
means more deaths, if you can’t efficiently contain him it’s not worth the risk.
I’m against the death penalty, and
even in vampire society - which is more or less built on crime - we don’t execute our criminals. We do everything we can
to rehabilitate them. But I don’t deny that these are special circumstances.
Louis really should at least test the containment strategy first, while
preparing himself to do what might be necessary. That’s some fan-fiction I want
to see.
You’d think that if his
mind-reading was voluntary – which it seemed to be with the planter’s wife – he
would have read her mind at some point during that scene to, you know, confirm
she wasn’t doing exactly what she was doing. Or, I don’t know, maybe read her mind at
some point while she was pissed off at him for the same reasons. Okay, we’ll
give Lestat and Claudia the benefit of the doubt, and say he can’t read
Vampires’ minds.
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So, here's why Lestat didn't read Louis or Claudia: he can't. Not because they're vampires, exactly, although hiding one's mind is a skill one acquires over the centuries, but because they're too close in terms of bloodline. Lestat performed the Dark Trick on both Louis and Claudia, and as their direct sire, their minds were closed to him. I don't recall it being covered in the movies, but it was absolutely in the books.
ReplyDelete(out of character) Thanks! That's interesting. That wasn't specificied in the film though- which was the focus of the article. That would've been interesting, they really should've said that in the movie.
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